If you’re looking for some laughs, you should check out this list of mustache jokes and quotes! From outdated sayings to corny jokes about mustaches, these will have you cracking up in no time. So whether you’re feeling down or just need a good laugh, these jokes are sure to put a smile on your face. So get ready to laugh – and maybe even learn something – from these 35 funny mustache jokes!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
There’s no telling why the chicken crossed the road…maybe it was looking for food, or maybe it just got lost. But whatever the reason, we’re glad it did!
These funny mustache jokes and quotes are sure to give you a good laugh. If you don’t have a mustache, you can always borrow one from your friend with a nice handlebar mustache!
1. “I told my barber, ‘I want that mustache on an apple.’ He said, ‘No problem.'” – Will Ferrell 2. “A man walked into a bar with a toupee on his head and said to the bartender,’Hey, I’m new in town and I need to get some tips.’ The bartender said,’What kind of tips?’ The man replied, ‘ tips on how to pick up women.’ 3. “Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!” – A famous proverb 4. “I had two mustaches, but I shaved them both off.” – Steve Martin 5. “If life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” – Unknown
Why couldn’t the clown get through the door?
It seems like no matter how many times the clown tries to get through the door, he just can’t seem to make it. Maybe it’s because he’s wearing a silly mustache or maybe his costume is just too funny – either way, the clown isn’t getting anywhere! But don’t worry, there are plenty of other jokes out there that you can use to have some laughs. Here are some funny mustache jokes and quotes to give you a good laugh:
Why couldn’t the clown get through the door?
Because he was wearing a silly mustache!
Why did the tomato cross the road?
Tomatoes are one of the most popular vegetables in the world, and for good reason: they’re delicious! But did you know that tomatoes also have a funny side? Here are some funny mustache jokes and quotes to give you a good laugh.
1. Why did the tomato cross the road?
To get to the other side!
Why did the banana cross the road?
Bananas have always been associated withlaughter. From the classic nursery rhyme, “A banana, a banana,
One for me and one for you.
Put them in your pocket,
Or give them to a monkey,
He’ll eat them all up!” to newer jokes aboutbananas being used as sex toys oraskeys during lovemaking,bananas are popular sources ofhumor. Here are 10 morefunny mustache jokes and quotes about bananas tofurther amuse your friends and family:
1) If you want to make someone mad,give them a banana!2) Bananas are the perfect sizefor hiding pieces of candy under.3) Why did the chicken cross the road?To get to the other side!4) Ifyou want to know how intelligent a banana is, just put it ina bowl with a frog and a snake.5) A funny joke about bananas is that theyare like condoms: You never know howmuch fun you’re gonna have with one!6) One reason why bananas don’t rot is because theyeat themselves.7) Just becausebananas are round doesn’t mean they can’t fly.8) Bananas should not be eatenafter dark because they contain potassiumchloride which makes you sick in the morning9) When was the last time you saw a monkeywith a mustache? Never10) Do not try this at home kids- puttinga banana on your head will only make you lookodd
Why did the peanut cross the road?
Peanut crossed the road because he was in a hurry. He had an important date with his girlfriend, Betty, and he didn’t want to be late. The traffic was really heavy, but Peanut kept pushing forward. Finally, he made it to the other side. He ran into Betty’s house breathless, but she was just as excited to see him as he was to see her. They sat down and ate their peanut butter and jelly sandwiches together. It was the best date ever!
Why did the duck cross the road?
There’s just something about ducks that makes them hilarious. Whether they’re waddling across the road or just spinning around in circles, they always seem to bring a smile to our faces. Here are some mustache jokes and quotes to make you laugh out loud!
Why didn’t the elephant cross the road?
An elephant was crossing the road and a car ran over it. The driver got out of the car to see if he could help and an old woman said, “Don’t touch that elephant! It’s worth a million dollars.” The driver looked at the elephant and saw that its trunk was broken. He then went back to the car and drove away.
Why did the mosquito cross the road?
Mosquitoes often cross streets to take advantage of warm weather and fresh blood. In some cases they may be attracted to a chemical smell left by humans or other animals. They may also wander into yards or onto porches accidentally.
Why did the worm cross the
1. Why did the worm cross the road?
To get to the other side!
What does a mustache mean?
A mustache means you’re a man. A clean-shaven face just isn’t manly enough anymore. When you sport a mustache, you’re telling the world that you’re in charge and ready to take on anything life throws your way. Be sure to make your mustache work for you by choosing the right style for your facial features.
Here are some funny mustache jokes to get you started:
1) Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side with his mustache intact!
2) If Barbie had a real life, she’d be a hot bearded woman.
3) I told my wife I was going out for dinner and a night on the town, but instead I came home with a new mustache!
4) My wife asked me why I’s got such a big mustache, and I said “I’m getting old, and these things start falling out.”
5) A man went into a barbershop and asked for a shave. The barber said, “I can’t do that guys – it’ll ruin your beard.” The man replied “I don’t care – give me a shave!” 6) Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side with his feathers intact!
What should I name my Moustache?
If you’re looking for a witty and clever way to show off your facial hair, then you’ll want to check out these hilarious mustache jokes and quotes. From classic one-liners to clever Willie Nelson references, these jokes will have you laughing out loud!
Think your moustache is the best in the world? Prove it with one of these hilarious mustache jokes!
1. If a moustache falls in love, does it have a heart attack?
2. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side with his moustache intact!
3. A man walked into a bar with a moustache. The bartender said, “You must be new around here.” The man replied, “I am not new, I am old school.”
4. Why did the chicken cross the road again? So that he could prove that he didn’t need a moustache!
5. If two mooses were sitting in a barbershop drinking scotch together and one asked the other, “How do you like your moose?” The other moose would reply “I like my moose smooth!”
How far should my mustache go?
There is no one answer to this question, as it depends on your personal taste and facial hair style. However, most people generally agree that a good mustache shouldn’t go too far down your neck or past your lip. Some mustache enthusiasts even go so far as to say that a neat, well-trimmed beard is the ideal look for men. So, what’s the right length for you? Here are some funny mustache jokes and quotes to help you get started:
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!
Funny Mustache Jokes & Quotes To Give You A Good Laugh